foodchewer:

if ur looking for me i’ll be in the trash

141,372 notes

basedpidgeot:

given my follower count and the number of days in a year its way more than reasonable to assume that it’s one of your birthdays today

happy birthday whoever you are

139,968 notes

68,696 notes


44,184 notes

pizza:

demoncest:

i really hate this ‘ur other half is out there somewhere u just gotta meet them’ like fuck off im not incomplete im a whole person and i dont need anyone to ‘complete me’ the only thing i need is a pizza and not ur shit bye

yeah thats right, all you need is me

331,185 notes

bitch-about-it:

My sister forgot how to say “turn up the volume” so she said “zoom in on the sound”

43,763 notes

defilerwyrm:

that one person you never really talk to but you reblog the shit outta each other

image

170,706 notes

saddeer:

zkac:

what’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination?

HAAAAAAAAAND EYEEEEEEEEEE

i hate this i hate u 

157,351 notes

baracknobama:

u still use a nokia?? haha loser btw how was bingo night did u remember to take ur medication? 

46,881 notes


ass-so-fat:

OHMIHGOD ; I LOVE ELLEN .

275,181 notes


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